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You don’t have to be scared of being a mom

Motherhood is a beautiful journey. Being a mom is fascinating, interesting and fun but also hard, scary and maddening. You will have mom jitters all the time throughout your motherhood. Especially if you are a new mom, you will be scared of everything, from bathing to carrying your new-born. So, to make you feel at ease and spare you from nervousness quite a bit, here is the list of fears all mums have faced that you will too, and what you should do about it.

1. Believe in your instincts

Sure, being a new mom is difficult. Along with feeding, cleaning and entertaining your new-born, the lack of sleep, vacations, sick leaves, and the excessive play of hormones, everything is taking a toll on you. It is pretty common to let the overwhelming list of tasks blur your instincts. But with time, you will overcome the nervousness of being a mom and gain confidence to fully trust your motherly instincts.

2. Am I doing it wrong?

You might read millions and millions of book about delivery and parenting. But once your little one steps into this world, all the bookish knowledge goes in vain and all you could do is build up the anxiety and wonder if whatever you are doing is right. All mothers have been in that phase. And how do you overcome this fear? Trust your instincts and do whatever you feel is right for your child. Or, you can always ask your closest loved ones for advice.

3. Fear of society or the people around you

When you deliver a baby, each and every person around you becomes some kind of an expert in this particular field. They express their concerns, their preferred parenting style, their opinions and you can’t help but think about everything they tell you. It takes some time to learn to ignore the rush of advice and be confident about what you are doing. But once you are up and running, no one can beat you.

4. Will I break the baby?

What if my baby slips out of my hand? What if I drop him while carrying around? What if I hit his soft spots? These ‘what ifs’ are good enough to disturb your good night’s sleep. Of course, you can’t have a good night’s sleep after having the baby. That’s a different story altogether. All mothers have been in that phase and so will you. All you can do is believe in yourself and your superhuman abilities. You have given birth to another being. You have gone through pain more than any other human could experience. When you have sailed through that phase successfully, you can succeed in this phase too.

5. Fear of setting a bad example

At some point of time, you will encounter situations when you break down due to some unforeseen circumstances or burst out in anger when things don’t go your way or showcase your disappointment or rage with bad language and for sure, you will worry that you are setting a bad example for your child. Although it is good to do everything in your ability to be a good example for your child, it is okay to struggle once in a while as long as you are able to explain good behaviour and life’s ups and downs to your child.

6. Fear of losing self

Once you become a mum, all the other things will be given a backseat to make space and time for a child. As a matter of fact, your priorities are no longer what they were once and you are also changing as a person. You will feel overwhelmed and underappreciated. You have a feeling that you will lose yourself in the journey of motherhood. But with time, things will get easier. You will learn to re-evaluate yourself and find a way to have a sense of self. And when it does, you will realize, motherhood is an important phase in life but it is not everything.

It is normal to have these fears and it only shows that you care enough to do what is best for your child. You may not have it figured out now, but soon, you’ll be excelling at it. 

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Dear Mommy,

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