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Why sibling fights can be good thing?

Have you ever imagined your children holding hands, playing peacefully and being happy as they are sharing their time together? Well, that is mostly the dream that never comes true. As any mom in the tranches can tell, the sibling relationship isn’t quite as rosy. In reality, the sibling relationship and their interaction is a multifarious dance with ups and downs and it all starts as soon as your second child is born. Though it is nerve-wracking for the parents to see their kids fight over for petty things, the constructive side of this sibling rivalry is – it helps the siblings to master all kind of skills that are needed to survive in this lifetime. Here is the list of positive effects of sibling rivalry in detail.

1. Problem-solving skills:

Siblings can and do fight often. Though these feuds are frustrating to parents, it is not all bad because after the fights and at the end of the day, the siblings have to solve their problems. Each time the siblings navigate their daily issues and negotiate their conflicts, they learn an invaluable skill. It is a great practice for conflict-resolution challenge that they will face in the later part of life. These skills they learn in kids playroom will probably the direct translation of the deal-making skill exhibited in the companies boardrooms. Though this knowledge won’t make anything easier for parents, they could still find solace in understanding that these fights are temporary and have lots of developmental advantages.

2. Communication skill:

Along with the negotiation skills, they also develop communication skills as a result of sibling rivalry. No one is born with the skill of effective communication. It is learned with practice. Sibling fights and peace-making after the fights help in developing this skill. While taking the helm of an issue and parleying an argument, the children learn to express themselves effectively with words and actions thereby developing one of the invaluable skills, Communication skill.

3. Self Control:

It takes lots of energy to keep your calm and cool when someone is in your space constantly and often against your wishes. When your children are posed with the challenge of sharing their space, their toys, and their food with their siblings, they gradually learn to control their anger displays and urges towards one another. This, indeed, helps the children in developing the fine art of self-control. As your children learn to replace the belligerent impulses with assertive messages, they develop emotionally bright communication skill.

4. Listening:

Though at first, your child may deny listening to what their brother or sister is saying to them during the fight, they gradually learn the art of calming themselves and listening to what the other person is talking about. This helps them to give a thought about the perspective of the other person and try to understand it.

5. Empathy:

Along with the listening comes the empathy towards the others. As your children grow up, they learn to listen carefully and calmly about what the other person is talking, understand and appreciate their point of view and empathize. Learning to empathize helps in a long way in their lifetime, especially once they get married and settle down with their partner. 

In a nutshell, no matter how deep the rivalry is between the siblings, they are the best teachers to each other. Apart from the life lessons they teach such as conflict-resolution, negotiating, communicating effectively, self-control in difficult situations, listening and empathizing, they also teach each other the power of unconditional love, the power of a strong support system and the power of I’ll-be-there-for-you-no-matter-what. 

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