Women go through a rollercoaster of emotions and hormones during and after their pregnancy. During these times, it is very difficult to predict how her mood will be at a certain period during the day or even at a certain minute within a given hour. But she has given us the miracle of life and gone through so much pain, so the least we could do to support her is not piss her off.
At times, we say some things which we don’t quite think through. Even if we do think them through, they may not be what the other person wants to hear at that particular moment. So choose your words, wisely.
Here are a few things that you ought not to say to a new mom:
Don’t ask her when she’s going back to work or if she is going back at all. Let her have that free time with her baby to figure out if work is just as important as taking care of her little one. She will have plenty time to deal with emotions about having to go to work and leave her baby with child care.
2. Another baby
This is a straight ‘do not mention’ topic. Not just the mother but even the father needs time to get their head around the baby that has already arrived. With sleep deprivation and improper eating patterns, it is difficult to think about wanting to make more additions to the family.
3. Her weight
This is common sense. She has just delivered an entire human being and her body is bound to be different than what it was like before. Refrain from commenting on her weight before and after birth, and let everyone live in peace.
4. Forcing breastfeeding
This may mostly come from the older people in the family who think that it is better to breastfeed. While breastfeeding is certainly better than formula, it should be the mother’s right to make this decision. Always remember that she might be going through some issues which you are unaware of, so always think twice before commenting on someone’s choices as to how they want to feed or bring up their baby.
She knows that she has to exercise and start eating properly in order to lose her pregnancy weight, so do not tell her again. It is quite stressful being a mother and is emotionally as well as physically exhausting. Her body still needs the time to heal and completely recover. So while you may have her good in mind, remember that managing a baby takes up almost most of the mother’s time and energy.
6. Not-so-good comments about the babyPeople love to find faults, whether it is in the case of material things or in the case of human beings. Please, never, ever pass comments that are even remotely un-nice about the baby. It took her 9 months to create that beautiful baby and it will always be the diamond of her eyes, no matter your opinion. So when you pass bad comments about the baby’s physical attributes or qualities in general, you are only cooking a recipe for self-depreciation in the eyes of the baby’s mother.
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