Most married couples dream of having a baby. They usually have an idea or a plan for when they are going to have a baby too. Reasons behind the wait could vary between couples - one of them may want to complete their studies, they may want to save enough money or simply because they need to prepare themselves mentally and emotionally to have a baby.
Although everyone has an idea of when they want to have a baby, some couples end up having to wait for years before they finally have a baby. Others are blessed with a baby without trying too much. Then there are those couples who have an unplanned pregnancy. This can be an emotionally confusing state for the couple. They may have wanted to have a baby but may not have been prepared for it.
If you had an unplanned pregnancy, here is what you need to do:
1. Have a heart-to-heart conversation
The first step is to sit down with your husband and talk about the pregnancy. Set up a few ground rules before you start this conversation - no raising voices, think 3 times before saying anything, etc. Even if your husband is the most understanding man on the planet, there are chances that he may say something he doesn’t mean to say.
Talk about what you are going to need to do next - doctor visits, saving up money, baby supplies, etc. Figure out what you need to feel comfortable - maybe you want to call your mother home or you want to stay with your family for a while. If you are working, you may have to take leave for a few months later on during the pregnancy. Talk to your parents and close friends/relatives about it too to gain perspective.
2. You are young and that’s a good thing
If you feel like you are too young to become a mother, remember that having a baby early is actually better for you. There are so many benefits like being a young mother. You can peacefully enjoy an early retirement by the time your kids become parents. Chances are your parents will be able to help take care of your kids.
Also, you will avoid being in a position where you have to look after your growing kids and your ageing parents at the same time. You have all the energy you will need to handle your little one now. Counting these blessings is the best way to look at your pregnancy.
3. Remember that it will all be alright
You may feel like you are not ready for your baby but right now, the little one in your belly needs you. You need to stop worrying about everything and focus on your pregnancy. Your husband may not be ready either. So, it is important to talk about how you feel and get through it together. Once your little one is in your arms, you will forget everything else.
Focus on how you both are going to be the best parents for your baby. Start talking to other moms in the same age range and find out how they are coping with their pregnancy. There are plenty of online mom communities where you can find moms in the same pregnancy stage you are in as well. Seek professional help if you need to. Your emotional health is very important during this time.
4. Hunt for a good doctor
The most important part of your pregnancy is your health. You need to make sure that you receive the best care possible. Find a doctor who has a good reputation and one whom you feel comfortable with. Most doctors are kind and supportive but there are a few that may be arrogant. Since you need someone who will guide you through every silly doubt that you get, you need to find someone who is patient enough.
It is also important to see to it that your doctor stays near your house so that you are able to rush over in case of an emergency. Also, make notes of everything that your doctor tells you. It is a good idea to carry a notepad with you when you meet your doctor. Write down any doubts that you may have before every doctor meeting and ask them all.
5. Start making healthier choices
Since you need to be taking care of yourself, start by making healthier lifestyle choices. If you are a drinker, it is best to stay off the alcohol during your pregnancy. You need to start eating a whole extra meal every day and your meals need to be nutritious.
If you are allergic to certain foods or if you are a vegetarian, your doctor may recommend taking certain supplements during your pregnancy. You can even ask for meal advice from your doctor so that you are able to meet the nutritional needs.