Marriages are not a fun ride which you can avail whenever you feel like. They are a lot more than just an agreement on a piece of paper which you sign in a marriage court, in the presence of a judge. Marriage is about understanding each other, looking out for one another and being there for the other person in their hardest of times. But all this will only come out of real commitment.
It is not an easy task to make every marriage work. Things are meant to go wrong, fights are supposed to happen, but it is you who needs to stick together no matter.
Many people, including, psychologists, researchers, couples, etc. argue on what exactly it means to be committed in a marriage. This topic has raised quite some debates and speculations on the internet.
Whatever the factors, there are always certain things that you can keep a finger on and say that yes, that is commitment.
Let us have a look at these few things:
In a country like India, live in relationships are unheard of concepts and although we are modernized, society is still orthodox about some elements of relationships. Therefore, it is only when you are married that you start living with your spouse and not before that. There are certain habits which you come across only after actually living with a person under the same roof for a considerable period of time. If and when you come across certain habits of your partner which you do not particularly like, learn to accept them. If these things are annoying you too much, then speak to your partner and come to a mutual solution rather than becoming a complaint box. These could be issues as simple as one partner being messy and the other one liking things neat and clean around the house.
You are not at your parents’ house or at your university hostel anymore where you could do whatever you liked and no one would stop you. While being childlike is of utmost importance, you need to understand that you are now in a mature relationship and your acts and decisions, affect another person, your spouse. Occasionally, there might arise situations, in the course of your marriage, wherein you might have to sacrifice on multiple occasions. Ask yourself if the sacrifice is bigger than your relationship with that person. Most of the times, the answer will be affirmative. But at the same time, it is also necessary for you to know when and where to draw the line. Marriage is an effort by both parties and if only one of you keeps trying too hard, the results might be disastrous.
This is one thing that applies to all forms of relationships, not just marriages. Loyalty is one quality that never goes unappreciated. Commitment is a lot about being loyal to your spouse throughout and not letting them down. When we say loyalty, it means knowing that you have to stick by your partner even when the world is against them, but at the same time making sure that you are not blinded into standing for wrong things. At times, your spouse can be misplaced about certain things; in such cases, rather than mocking them and demeaning them, stand by their side and guide them to the right path. It is only when you stand together, can you grow and prosper together.
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