“To the world, you are someone and to someone, YOU ARE THE WORLD!” - Bill Wilson
We, as mothers, are so involved in being the world to the little ones that we forget we are humans too. We push ourselves beyond our limits. We love endlessly, protect perpetually, support constantly and hold our families together always. We take the role of the cooks, personal shoppers, janitors, maids, teachers, repairmen, caretakers and what not. And if time demands, we will even become a personal entertainer, weightlifter and multi-task expert for our families and the kids. In fact, we do superhuman things.
We give birth to people, we can perform the duties of at least 5 people in one day. We comfortably juggle between the tasks. We prepare dinner while playing and entertaining with our youngest kid and teaching maths to our oldest kid. And if situations insist, we can also push in other tasks such as loading dishwasher and paying bills online in the series of tasks which we are already performing. But do you know what is the most difficult part of mothering? It is that we are expected to Love every bit of this journey, no matter if we are happy or sad about it. The society persuades us about “How we are supposed to love the motherhood” and our conscience intimidates us to feel guilty if we don’t love it.
Motherhood comes with an expansive range of unfathomable emotions. From the high of being in love with your child to desperation to abandon your responsibilities. It needs softness, strength and awe but at the same time, it also involves struggles, suffering and sadness. It entails eternal physical and mental load. But what is most stressful? It is professing the pains, frustrations, anger and helplessness of mothering. Partially because of our conscience and the rest because of the picture our society has depicted of “Perfect mother” since ages.
Our conscience won’t let us showcase our weak self to our kids. We smile even when we are screaming inside our head. We hide our tears even when we are in pain. And when society is considered, we are scared of being judged. We are afraid of being called as “BAD” mother. The society’s definition of “Good” mother makes us feel terribly guilty.
But guess what? It is okay! It is okay to be ourselves. We are humans too. We laugh, we cry, we love, we hate, we trust, we fear and we feel disgusted sometimes. We have our good and bad times, highs and lows, wants and needs. We are flawed just like any other human being in this world and it is absolutely okay to embrace and unveil your dark side. It is okay to display your emotions. It is okay to convey your kids that you become impatient and frustrated sometimes.
Let your kids see how much you love your family and also let them see how you respond for annoyances, let them see how hard you work round-the-clock and let them also see how crippled you are at the end of the day. Let them see you are a human too! Admitting your emotions doesn’t mean you are performing a shoddy job or that you love your kids any less. Instead, it helps your little person to realize that you too have immense and exhaustive emotions and you mess up sometimes. The benefit of this is your child will learn that it is absolutely fine to embrace their real self wholeheartedly.
So, dear mums, look within yourself and notice and acknowledge how fantastic you are. and Celebrate your good and bad, strengths and weaknesses and embrace your “Mompower” to perform superhuman things. Accept the fact that you are a human and made as “mom” along the journey of motherhood. Savour every little moment with your child and also love yourself for what you are.