We all dream of having that fairytale marriage where everyone is always happy and merry. But the reality is that marriages require a lot of work to make it work. Arguments, disagreements and compromises are all a part of marriage. Finding the right balance is key to a strong marriage.
If you feel that you are having too many fights and that you can’t handle it anymore, just take comfort in knowing that most happily married couples have felt this way at some point during their marriage and still make it celebrate their 25th anniversary together. The reason being that these couples have figured out what it takes to have a long-lasting marriage.
Listed below are a few golden rules to follow for a strong and happy marriage:
1. Fall in love all over again
Jog your memory to try and recollect the way you felt when all was well in your paradise. Try to remember what it was like when you first started to fall in love. What did he say that drove you nuts? What did you do for him? Glance through your marriage photos, talk to your friends and family about happier times and then write down all the positive thoughts and traits about your partner. When you remember all the things that you love about him, you will also remember that he is the same person after all.
2. Work on what is lacking
Take the time to reflect on where the marriage is lacking. Was it a lack of care and affection? Perhaps your partner said something hurtful one too many times? Was there a communication gap? Or was it some sort of crisis that showed that your marriage just couldn’t survive? Keeping a record of what is lacking in your marriage can help you figure out what needs to be worked on. It is important to keep sharing things with each other and to make time for each other.
3. Prioritise your marriage
When your marriage is in troubled waters, it becomes highly essential for you to prioritise your marriage over anything else - this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t make time for each other otherwise. When all is well, make it a point to talk to each other every night before you go to sleep. When in troubled waters, you should be in a position to spend an entire day to smoothen things out.
5. Start listening to each other
The most important part of communication is not talking - it is listening. Ask your partner about how they feel. Don’t interrupt them as they speak. Once they are done, you can tell them what is on your mind. Do this exercise of listening to each other at least once every day and you will notice how your married life improves by a significant amount.
6. Talk to each other
The second most important thing is of course talking. Having a heart to heart conversation with your partner is everything. It can save your marriage by just having one conversation every day - over breakfast or dinner.