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Tinystep Editorial

19th October 2016  •  3 min read

How Should You Deal With The First Child When The Second One Is On Its Way?


When you’re planning for a second child, there a few very important things you should keep in mind regarding dealing with child number one. So far he/she has been your only kid and the dynamics change completely when the second one arrives. I would say, that the arrival of a second child affects the first child the most because he/she can feel things changing drastically.



What can one do to prepare the first child for the second one? Here are some tips:


1. Your child needs to hear about the second baby from you. It’s important that the parents the break news and not just anyone else.


2. If your child has been sleeping with you and you have to move the kid to another room, do it well before the second kid arrives.


3. Prepare your child well by telling this what having a baby initially is like. What the baby does and how it can’t be a playmate for a while.


4. Visit friends with babies so it’ll help your child prepare itself for what’s coming.


5.You can also show your child pictures and videos of itself as a baby. And talk about babies in general.


6.Use a doll and help your child practice the art of dealing with the baby.


7. Do whatever you can to make the first child feel involved by assigning chores and anything related to the baby. It could something as simple as selecting clothes or a pet name for the baby.


How can you help the first child adjust to the baby? Once the baby is out everything changes. Here’s how you can help your first child deal with the situation:


1.Ensure you make some one-to-one time for your first child. Even 10 minutes will make a big difference.


2.Your first child may feel aggressive about the shift in environment, it’s important you address those emotions.


3.Pamper your first child if that’s what he/she is craving for. Sometimes, treat your child like a ‘baby’. That also helps a great deal.


4.Help both your children bond. Make them spend together and teach your older child how to take care of the baby.


5.When your friends and relatives come to see the baby, ask them to spend some time with the older child as well.


6.Ensure your child has its privacy and things that belong just to him or her.


7.Make them realise the benefits of being the older child and make them feel content wherever they’re in life.


8.At times get gifts and things for your first child as well so that he/she doesn’t feel neglected and unimportant.


9.Involve the first child in taking care of the second child. Like bath sessions, play time, etc. Give the first child a role to play.


These before and after tasks will help you deal with the first child much better and things will be at peace when the second baby is here. It’s important they feel needed and are prepared well for what’s coming. Your first child will feel constantly insecure, but you need to keep addressing that. Happy Parenting!


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