Being a woman isn’t easy at all. You start your life listening to what your parents have to say and seldom you do what you please.
Once you’re married, you’re completely in love with your husband. You cannot even see the world beyond that because he is your world. Blinded in love, you can do anything for him. So, you end up listening to whatever he says. And the best part is that you like doing things he says! It is so cute of you to be such a dedicated wife.
Soon your honeymoon phase gets over and you’re pregnant. Once your baby is born, you dedicate your life to build her life. Somewhere in the middle of this battle between your two personas- of mother and wife, you either lose yourself completely or you become a potential enemy for the other person.
It’s quite simple, you give more attention to your child, your husband will feel ignored and hence there will be problems in your marriage. If you give a lot of attention to your husband, your child will feel ignored. A mother’s role in the child’s development and growth is quite important. Without a mother, support children go astray.
Being a mother, it takes a lot of guts to choose a side because on both the ends, there lies a person you really love- your husband and your child.
No matter how much you love your husband, you’ll always love your child a little extra. This extra love is called “Motherhood” which always has an upper hand.
Your child is your priority because when she was in your womb you made a promise to her that you will stick with her through thick and thin. You didn’t even have to think twice before you made the deal because she is a part of you, born of the same flesh and the same blood running through both your veins.
With a simple example, the intensity of pain experienced after seeing your child crying is way more painful than anything else. Your child’s tears will make you vengeful and fill you with rage because you love your baby so much!
Studies say that once you have a child, 80% of your attention belongs to your child and your husband is jealous of that fact. He will not say it but he will express it through his actions.
He will do things to get your attention. He knows you’re busy with the baby and he will purposefully trouble you. He will do things like randomly going out with his friends and come home late...really late. He will do things like eat dinner outside without telling you, he’ll make you suspicious and grab you emotionally. All he wants is your emotions, importance and of course love!
If he notices that you’re concerned, he’ll definitely know where to draw the line. He is a one woman man and he belongs with you.
Just because you’ve been giving attention to your child a little more than your husband, that doesn’t make you a mean wife. You are a woman who is new to motherhood. He also has become a father for the very first time, so the whole concept of divided attention isn’t quite clear to both of you. However, as your child grows up, you should be in a position where you’ll be able to balance out things and life in such a way that you’ll be an awesome mom and a phenomenal wife. Most importantly, you need to make peace with yourself and consider yourself as a wonderful mom. You’re a great mom and we know that you’re doing all you can.
Your child has was, is and always will be your priority. Remember that you’ll always have two children- your husband and your baby!