If you just found out that your little one is getting an even littler sibling and don’t know what to expect, you’ve come to the right place. First off, congratulations, you’re having another one! Your current little one must be super excited and it’s probably all smiles and good cheer around the house. When it comes to what it’s going to be like the second time around, don’t expect it to be the same as the first time.
So much has happened from the time you had your first child, regardless of the actual time that may have passed. You now have a kid and you know what it’s like to be a parent. Your body has gone through changes too. So how is it different the second time? Here are some pointers that may answer this question:
This one’s got more to do with the mums. The first time around, it was all about you. Feet up and always being told to rest. You put in as much effort as you could muster with the cute maternity clothes and creams and everything you need to look your best and be pregnant.
The second time around, it’s not so much the same. When you’ve got a kid to look after and a household to run, you don’t even have time to think about rest or beauty.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. You may find yourself being able to handle all these things along with your pregnancy because you’ve got the hang of it. You’ll find yourself giving less importance to your cute maternity clothes and pregnancy appropriate makeup. So bye-bye dresses, hello track pants!
Pregnancy number one: Every single moment was snapshotted and documented. Every day, every sonogram, every little movement. Pregnancy number two: the wonder of it is gone. You know what you really need to be focusing on and what is really just you being over-excited. Again, this is not a bad thing.
It helps you focus on the really important things without wasting your time and emotions on every single small occurrence. Apart from the changes you in see in your own behaviour, be prepared to get less attention from your friends and family. You’ve gone through this once, this time it’s just “oh, she’s doing it again?”.
Don’t worry though, they’ll still be there and excited for all the main parts, and you’ll be thankful that you don’t have to deal with all the hovering nosey people through it all.
You probably couldn’t even count the number of books you read and things you bought during your first pregnancy to ensure it would go smoothly. From pregnancy and parenting books and pregnancy and parenting blogs to baby clothes, baby proofing, toys, nursery items, and special baby care products, you read, did, and bought it all.
This is also probably when you realised how much of waste of time and effort that was. By your second go, you probably know that your baby doesn’t know or care what his/her room looks like, what toys are around, and you probably didn’t end up using even a quarter of what you read in those books.
By your second pregnancy, you’ll find yourself doing about a fraction of the preparation you did the first time. It’s mostly “what do I have from the first time that I can still use?” or “what do I have lying around that can be used for this?”.
All caution has been thrown to the wind. Whether it be your diet, exercise, grooming, or any other baby-related issue, you’re a much more chill person now. During your first pregnancy, you probably avoided most normal food as though it were the plague. Exercised diligently, went for check-ups every week, met all the nutritionists and specialists to make sure you were doing everything right.
By the second pregnancy, you may find yourself over it. Just overall the hassle. No more special pregnancy food or going to the doctor every second day with some new worry. You kind of know what to expect and what actually needs to be worried about so you’re not overdoing it or stressing out as much now.
Having a baby is not exciting, the excitement just changes. Your first time, every single thing probably excited you. Every movement, every sonogram, every little change. Your second time, this changes. The excitement is there but it’s differently placed. It’s placed on the big things.
This time, you’re not tiring your friends and family out with updated every half an hour about some new thing you read or felt or decided you would do as a parent. This time, you’re a much calmer and collected person who gets excited at the right moments. One thing that doesn’t change is the excitement you feel when your baby comes into this world.
Let’s be real, your expectations during your first pregnancy were all bogus. Extremely starry-eyed and borderline delusional. This time, you know exactly what to expect and what not to. The great thing about this is that it helps you prepare to the correct extent required and you can get an idea how to ensure everything goes smoothly and how to make positive as many situations as you can.
This has got to be the best part about your second pregnancy. It comes with a newfound confidence and sense of assurance. The first time around, there was so much ambiguity about what to expect and everything was new. During your second pregnancy, you know you’ve already done it once so you’re less worried and more confident in your abilities to handle situations, pregnancy, and a baby when it comes.
Having a baby will not feel like a new and exciting experience, but the pregnancy experience does change. Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s any less special or happy.
You’ve done it once so Keep Calm and Baby On!