Having a child is a huge deal. It’s a lifetime of picking up and putting together the pieces. As you and your partner decide to have a child of your own, a thousand questions flood your mind; Is this the right time? Are we taking on too much? Are we financially stable? and more on the lines of the same. There are times where you both are unsure but don’t let the miracle of making a new life intimidate you. All your fears, the legitimate ones and the irrational are addressed here in this article, along with the reasons you shouldn’t let it freak you out.
1. Mothers - Childbirth!
Not being able to handle childbirth is a major fear of most to-be mums. Well, don’t worry so much because you can do it. Countless others have gone through the same experience and we aren’t extinct yet so it can’t be that bad right? Your body has been preparing itself in the 9 months that little person has been growing inside you. I’ll be honest, being a birth-giver isn’t going to be a walk in the park but that doesn’t mean you can’t handle it. Sometimes, the best things in life take the most effort. No pain, no gain. Right? Side note: The product of childbirth is totally worth braving the experience.
2. The numbers game
Even the best of us may have a constant worry that our baby may be overweight or underweight, or have low blood oxygen or high blood oxygen, or a high this and a low that. To you I say, take a breath. Just because the digits don’t match the average doesn’t mean something has gone horribly wrong. What’s so wrong with not being average? Consult the doctor and do your thing. Most of the times, it isn’t a cause for concern and the numbers will stabilise soon enough.
3. Accidents (Oops!)
I know we all have that constant fear that we’ll drop the baby or fall while holding the baby or bump the baby’s head somewhere. There is no end to the imagination, am I right? We think of all the possible baby-related accidents that could happen. My advice? Trust yourself and leave the rest to baby proofing! (Forget about your baby falling off the balcony, you probably won’t even be able to step foot out there for a while.)
4. Feeding Time!
Mums, you hear and read so much about sore breastfeeding makes a woman, the dryness that accompanies it, and the pain that follows. There may be many times where you want to take a break from nursing. Preventing this isn’t as hard as you think. Make sure you take care of your body. There are numerous creams and butters in the market which help combat dryness and soreness. Taking care yourself is an important part of taking care of your baby. Make it as painless as possible for the both of you!
5. What now?
“What the heck do I do now?” You fear that this question is going to cross your mind far too often, don’t you? Parenting isn’t easy, but it isn’t rocket science. (It’s worse... Just kidding!) It may take a while to get the hang of things and for your maternal and paternal instincts to kick in, But until then, absorb all the advice you get from your parents, relatives, and friends who have kids. They’ve been through it all before and their help could be invaluable.
6. Bath time
Babies are delicate; Soft heads, little fingers and toes, and sensitive skin. Bathing them may come across as the biggest challenge you’re ever going to have to face. But the fear goes away after the first few times. Make sure you use product that won’t be too harsh on your baby’s skin (i.e. fewer chemicals). Don’t be ashamed to ask for help from someone who has prior experience. Once you get the hang of it, bath time can become fun time! Get your partner involved and have a family foam party!
7. Baby Bonding
The bond formed between a baby and its parents is extremely important for the psychological development of the child as well as the future relationship between parent and child. Sometimes, you may fear that won’t make an instant connection with your child. I’m here to tell you that that’s okay. At the end of the day, the love is there, even if it doesn’t exhibit itself instantly. The tiny human in front of you is your own kid who needs you and you’re going to be there for him or her no matter what.
Tiny humans who have entered very recently need more stuff than you’d imagine. But you’ve probably already planned it all out. You must be afraid that this list you’ve made of things your baby needs is going to be very expensive to purchase. Helpful tip: budgeting goes a long way! You don’t have to go all out buying the fanciest toys or clothes for your child. Honestly, this tiny baby isn’t going to know or care what brand of clothes are keeping its body warm or whether the toy he or she is playing with is the latest big thing in the market.
9. Relationship problems - The bane of human existence.
An underrated worry of a lot of new parents is the effects that a child could have on their relationship. Babies need a lot of taking care of, we’ve established this. This moves all your focus onto the baby. Crying (and I’m not just talking about the baby here) and lack of sleep can wreak havoc on your day to day lives. Stress may lead to heated arguments with each other and tension between you and your partner. It’s important to know that this should be expected but it doesn’t last long. The baby always comes first which may upset you because, let’s face it, we all love attention. Communication is the key to preventing tension making itself a permanent member of the family. Make sure to keep talking to your partner about what you need them to do in order to help you. Make a plan that suits the both of you as well as the baby and it should be smooth sailing from there!